


Bonds and Bombs

by cylawings



Series: Bonds and Bombs (Tear My Heart Apart) [1]
Category: Final Space (Cartoon)
Genre: Denial of Feelings, Feelings Realization, Garycato Week, M/M, also tbh idk how to rate things so if you think the rating should be different also tell me, any tags you think I should add just tell me, basically takes place over the span of time throughout some previous eps and the last part is ep6, episode 6 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-21 07:34:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14280105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cylawings/pseuds/cylawings
Summary: With a kiss blown to the stars, I'll say goodbyeI promise you dear, I shall not cryFor when I look at the moon aboveI'll always be reminded of your love.





	Bonds and Bombs

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Garycato Week, combining Day 1 and 2's themes (Denial/Jealousy and Realization) with angst thrown in cause I'm me. Have fun

Gary had to admit, Avocato was one of the bestest friends he'd ever had. He was one of the _only_ friends he'd ever had… But that didn't matter! What mattered was he was here now and they got to spend so much time together! It was like every day was just another one spent deepening the bond they had formed, even just the days spent calm and casual around the ship.

They would talk about things sometimes. About their lives, about space, about what they wanted to do with their future after they got out of the mess they were in. Gary babbled about how he wanted to be a Captain for “realsies” one day. That earned him a laugh from Avocato, asking if that meant he was finally admitting he wasn't the captain. Gary immediately changed his stance, reaffirming he was totally the captain only to get H.U.E.’s typical reprimands in response.

Avocato on the other hand talked about his son. He said when he got him back (not “if he got him back” Gary noticed, Avocato _knew_ he was going to get his boy back even if it killed him) he would take him with him on journeys through space. Preferably safer ones than what he'd done before he had added. He just really wanted to spend the quality time with his son that they were robbed of thanks to his own bad life choices and Lord Commanders separation of them. Gary never interrupted Avocato talking about his son. It mattered too much for him to breathe a word until his friend finished, because when he talked about Lil Cato it was like some part of him came alive that hadn't been there before.

He smiled more, genuine small smiles sure but they were _there_. He also became sadder though. With the happiness, the flair of fire behind his eyes when he stated with confidence he'd get his son back, there was also a certain sorrow that weighed down on him. Almost literally, Gary could _see_ his shoulders slump, watched as his ears would turn down just slightly, when he started mumbling about how it was his fault his boy was stuck in such a bad situation. He had never got into the full story, Gary assumed it hurt too badly, and that's where he'd usually step in. He may not always know what to say, sometimes what he did say came out absolute nonsense, but he always wanted to at least try to help.

He tried to ignore how the way Avocato would start genuinely smiling at _him_ now made his face feel hot. The way his heart would hammer when Avocato stood just close enough he could almost feel his fur brushing against his arm. If Avocato noticed how close he would stand, he never corrected it. It slowly became something Gary accepted, something he loved. The light brushing of arms when they both were half awake in the kitchen getting breakfast, the way their hands almost touched while hanging at their sides when in the main room listening to H.U.E. explain where they were headed and how fast. Gary tried to ignore how every almost touch sent a jolt of electricity through his veins.

He tried not to think about how touch starved he felt, how touch starved Avocato must be, and he tried to definitely to _not_ think about how nice it would be to press closer when they were next to each other. How nice it'd feel to be lean against him, into another living beings touch, how it would feel to hug him and not let go, how nice it would be to lay against his side when they were sitting on one of the couches together… God, Gary needed to snap out of it. Avocato would probably find all that gay as hell. 

...Was Avocato gay? 

Wait, was _Gary_ gay?! 

No, no way he liked Quinn. He couldn't be! That's what he told himself anyways.... The way his heart swelled when Avocato looked at him fondly was something he couldn't deny was maybe a little gay. Just a little.

 

He laid awake at night sometimes, snuggled up with Mooncake in his blankets. “Do you think he feels like that too?” He asked quietly one night. “Maybe that's why he stands so close…”

“Chookity?”

“Hmm, your right. He could also be doing some weird… Alien thing to me.” He gasped softly, clinging to Mooncake a little tighter despite his green buddy kicking his feet a little in protest to the tighter hold. “What if he's slowly sedating me to eat my _brains_? He could secretly be a _brain eater!!!_ ”

Mooncake rolled to look up at him, giving him a look that brought him back from the delusion very quickly.

“Ah… Yeah, no.” Gary laughed softly, sighing and resting his face against the top of Mooncake as he curled up. “He's not a brain eater, you're right.”

 

Everything changed after they saved Quinn. Gary's obsession with her from all these years consuming all his thoughts, it was like he nearly forgot Avocato _existed._ Except he noticed the absence of him at his side. He noticed the invisible rift that formed between them when she showed up. He noticed how Avocato wouldn't get near him when she was there, how he'd hover off to the side, not making eye contact. It… hurt.

Gary didn't think one could miss the small little things so much, but he _did_. He missed the fur barely brushing against his arm, he missed the soft fingers that would lightly touch his that both would ignore and pretend didn't happen, he missed the warmth of someone always right next to him. Sure, Quinn would stand next to him but there was such a stark difference that Gary's chest ached when he first realized it. She never stood as close… She never even touched him, not even a hand on his shoulder. 

But his brain was too caught up on her. Too many years spent alone, obsessing and praying she'd reply one day. Years spent with Quinn being the extent of his interaction with another living person, even though she never replied. So he ignored the ache, he ignored the absence at his side, he ignored what he swore was hurt shining from Avocato’s eyes when he wouldn't shut up about Quinn. He ignored it all and pretended this was normal and fine. Mooncake cooed sadly at him one night, trying to get his attention, pulling lightly on his arm and trying to pull him towards Avocato’s room.

He ignored that too.

 

Then suddenly everything became serious again. They received Lil Cato’s coordinates, Avocato had tied up Quinn, and though Gary promised her he'd come back and help her next, he couldn't abandon Avocato’s side. Not now, not over something so serious. Though he covered it with his usual smiles and silliness, he felt an uneasy pit forming in his stomach. He needed to stay with Avocato, he desperately needed to make sure to bring him back safe.

He didn't have the time to think of shoving down his feelings when they were in the hall, the closest to each other they'd stood since Quinn had showed up. He could have sworn he was shaking having that warmth back next to him, feeling hands resting against his shoulders, his own gripping Avocato’s shoulder pads. They were close. Way too close. Gary felt like he couldn't breathe.

“What… is happening?” Avocato asked slowly, seeming almost a little amused at the predicament they'd found themselves in.

“I think we're…” about to ki- “about to hug.”

“Should we?” Avocato narrowed his eyes slightly at him, and Gary honestly couldn't tell if he was trying to be silly or being genuine.

“The sirens call is beckoning us to embrace, we shant ignore her!” Gary went with silly, responding accordingly (though honestly he'd probably respond the same way even if it was genuine).

And there it was, that soft genuine smile. The one that made his heart swell, made his hands shake too much, made him want to make sure Avocato smiled like that at him again and again and _again_. Then Gary pulled him close, and Avocato’s cheek fluff was rubbing against the side of his face, his strong arms were wrapped tightly around him. He felt his muzzle press against his neck, and he squeezed his eyes shut as he hugged his best friend back just as tightly.

Avocato sighed, and let go, Gary almost tightened his arms to keep him there because _no he didn't want him to leave_. He did release him, reluctantly, and Avocato smiled at him once stood back once more. One hand remained on Gary's upper arm though. “Thanks bud, I needed that.”

Gary smiled back, relishing in the hand remaining there on his arm. “Now let's go get your son back.”

 

And they did.

It was hard, a little terrifying when Lord Commander showed up, but they did it. He had never seen Avocato grin so widely, never had seen him so _happy_ as they returned to the safety of the ship. He took a moment once they'd gotten inside, catching his breath, smiling as he looked over to see Avocato hugging his son close with tears leaving tracks in his fur. Gary was so happy for him. He couldn't believe it, they'd done it, they'd gotten Lil Cato and Avocato was _so happy._

That was when he realized.

He was in love with him.

Was love too big of a jump to make? He'd only known him so long but… Then again, he also had decided he loved Quinn after knowing her for a very short period of time. Maybe it made sense, he'd spent longer with Avocato. They'd talked so much, done so much… _Survived_ so much. Together.

As Avocato said how excited he was for tomorrow, Gary couldn't help but think the same. Tomorrow, and the next day, and every day after that. He could tell Avocato how he felt, and he could get to know his son. He could see Avocato smile so much more now Lil Cato was finally safe. They would get to do so much more together.

He looked up at the same time Avocato though when a beeping began to raise in volume. A dreadful realization fell over them both. Gary felt his heart stop, staring with wide eyes as Avocato pulled a bomb off his sons back. Avocato stared at it with wide eyes, and all the happiness he'd been expressing a moment ago was crushed beneath shock, distress and a level of fear Gary had never seen in him before. It made Gary feel a surge of panic seeing him so scared.

They met eyes, Avocato’s wide and desperate, screaming “I trust you” at him without any words. “Take care of my boy,” he said, almost too quickly, and then he was turning, running away.

Gary didn't think he only reacted, grabbing Lil Cato and pulling him to his chest quickly when he tried to pursue his father. Everything exploded within seconds, Gary grabbing onto the closest thing with all his strength to keep him and Lil Cato from getting dragged out with the explosion. He could hear the kid screaming, sharp nails digging into his arm, fighting and kicking for Gary to let go of him. He didn't, if anything he held him tighter. 

And then it was over.

The ship sealed itself off, Gary and Lil Cato fell to the floor, and Gary looked back at the huge hole in the side of the ship just in time to see debris clear and… There was Avocato. Floating away, his own blood blown out and floating around him with the debris. Gary barely registered everything around him, eyes locked onto a dead Avocato floating further and further away. Vaguely he registered Lil Cato was on the floor, screaming and sobbing as he hit the metal, yelling something how unfair this all was. He could hear Quinn run down, kneeling down and trying to calm the kid down, rubbing his back and speaking softly to him.

“Gary, are you okay…?”

He snapped back to, looking finally away from the corpse and instead at Quinn. “I…” His voice was weak, barely coming out. He ended up saying nothing, and she looked like she understood, not pressing him to talk. Slowly he looked down at Lil Cato, now resting against Quinn's chest, sobbing into her clothes. He frowned and he finally seemed to realize how much his heart hurt. It felt so broken, like it'd shattered into a million pieces with the explosion. All the sharp shard remains of his heart were stabbing at his insides, making everything hurt in a way he couldn't describe. If it was possible, it broke even more watching Lil Cato.

Quinn lifted one arm from the child shaking in her embrace, holding it open in invitation to Gary. Gary took the offer, falling into her side, placing one arm around her and one around Lil Cato. “I'm sorry,” he whispered finally to him, head falling as he pulled him closer gently to them both. “ _I'm sorry_ …”

 

_With a kiss blown to the stars, I'll say goodbye  
 _I promise you dear, I shall not cry  
 _For when I look at the moon above  
 _I'll always be reminded of your love.____

___Goodbye Avocato. I should have realized and told you I loved you sooner._ _ _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading if you did, please leave your thoughts in a comment I'd love to hear them!
> 
> As you can see, this work was put in a series because I'm already writing something for the day thats themed for Angst that will be a sequel to this fic! Look forward to that.
> 
> My blog if you wanna check it out: Cylawings


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